Monday, April 30, 2012

What a day!!!

It seems today has been one of those days when I either should have stayed in bed or go bury my head in the sand!! First it really started yesterday when my ole man and I didn't speak to one another from me being angry with him over our intimate life!! It seems to me he can make every excuse in the book for not being making love to me there is!! It's bad enough I don't have a great self esteem as it is and this just seems to makes me feel worse!! I then get up this morning and he had been in from work for 2 hours in which he could have made that up to me but nooooo,he says he was just trying to let me sleep,I appreciate the effort but he could have come been intimate with me and then let me sleep afterwards!! Its seems to me our married life is like living as an old married couple!! Live together as married but with out the intimate part!!! And he thinks buying me things is his way of showing me he loves me,I could well do witout material things and would rather he show me the right way he loves me!!! Then we had a knock down drag out argument this morning which didn't put either one of us in a great mood all day and not speaking again!! And then we find out someone got Facebook to shut down our weather page and  he has been angry all day about that and trying to get it back and can't !!! And it just seems like when it rains ,it pours around here(bad wise) !!!! I'm so sick of arguments and fights all the time and he blames me for them when he could try to understand how we as women feel!! I feel like I have lucked out when it comes to men and romance!!! They just don't have it nor do they understand it!!! I guess we will be sleeping on opposite sides of the bed from now on if this keeps up!! If  I have to keep going through this I will scream!!! 

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

My starting!

O.K. Here goes,I am  58 years old and am a survivor! I was adopted at 5 years of age and raised an only child the abuse the started then and I lived with it for 40 years of my life. I ran away from home at 16 was put in a institution after a mental breakdown and then at 17 was put in a foster home which I ran away from and put in a place for kids who do stuff like that. After getting out I married at 18 by rebound and had my first child at 19. All this time still suffering abuse.(through 8 kids)  I haven't known what happiness was or is until finally 18 years ago after getting the courage to file for divorce and meeting the man who I am married to now. I have had a hard life and still suffer repucussions from all I lived through but am very thankful that I now have someone who treats me well and tries to do all he can to make me happy!! I started this so I could have a place to turn to when I feel down and need to talk and know that the Goddess will guide me where I need to go. Since turning to withcraft my life has been a lot better. And I have met some of the most wonderful people & made a lot of friends(witchy) ...I love each & everyone of them as if they were my family!!